“They’re only little once”, “They grow up so fast”, “Cherish these moments”. These are all quotes people tend to say when referring to parenthood, but are these sincere quotes? Is this something people just randomly say out of habit? At times people can be contradicting because in the same breath they question, “How long are you going to breastfeed?”, “How long will you co-sleep?”, “How long are you going to walk them to class?” I don’t mind curiosity, but these questions usually have a judgmental undertone or are followed by a frown when I have answered. Unsolicited advice tends to follow with ways to discontinue my methods.
I’m all for teaching children independence. Giving children some independence can give them great confidence! Giving children independence can also help with their developmental milestones. I’m all for giving my children life skills, but I doubt holding them longer or walking them to class past the first week of school will handicap them for life! I just want to scream, “Stop rushing me to let go of my babies!”
I have two little ones and I placed my career on a brief hold to stay home with them and give them as much love, attention, and nurturing that I could during the most important time of their development. The early years are crucial as their brains develop rapidly. The first five years is a time of rapid cognitive, linguistic, social, emotional and motor development. I would like to enjoy all these milestones without people telling me ways to let them go. If it’s not an inconvenience for me to drive and walk my child to school without school disruption, please stop suggesting I place him on the school bus. My son is still young, and there is not an issue with me taking him to school. I enjoy car rides with my little ones.
The world can be so cruel, especially to brown boys. I want to be intentional with showering them with love and attention. Some may think I’m raising “mama’s boys”, but aren’t boys supposed to love their mothers? So, if I want to nurse longer or co-sleep, please let me enjoy bonding with my babies. Motherhood is not always filled with roses and kisses. Let me enjoy my little ones in peace.
Why does it bother people on how long mothers decide to breastfeed? If the mother is unbothered and it still benefits the child, what’s the big deal? My kids will unlatch eventually. People’s pressure to push babies closer and closer to adulthood is frustrating. I have found my coping mechanism; ignore them. Enjoy your little ones as long as you want and how you want. When people say you have your hands full, just respond that your heart is even fuller. This might be a better response than an obscene gesture due to frustrations.
Love this!