Embracing the Hot Mess

I am the harried mom you saw in her pajamas at the local quick pizza place on a Thursday at 8:45 p.m. picking up dinner for her family because the chicken she had been cooking for two-and-a-half hours was still raw.

I am also the mom who forgot it was kindergarten registration and had to turn the car around to get all the paperwork that’s needed for that to happen. That included a quick stop off at the pediatrician to get the immunization records. (I did call them a few days in advance, but it had completely left my mind that day.) Would you believe it if I told you that my five-year-old reminded me?

True story.

I am the mom who doesn’t always get it right. You would think after three kids I’d have “all of this” down pat.

I have a demanding full-time job outside the home with a commute. Because Atlanta. I have an adult son who is navigating all the perils of being a twenty-something year old. I have a daughter who is about to graduate from high school and begin her own adventures in college. I have a five-year-old who is about to start kindergarten, if I got all the forms turned in properly, which, I swear also included a lock of hair, fingerprints, and DNA. I mean, how much paperwork do you NEED to go to kindergarten?!

But, I digress.

I have a husband who has his own demanding job. On top of that, I am in the sandwich generation who are trying to manage aging parents.

I’m trying, I really am. But there are some things that aren’t going to get done as perfectly as I would like them to be. There are a few days when I feel like I have it all together and everything goes smoothly and perfectly.

Okay, so maybe there’s been like ONE DAY where I’ve felt like I’ve had it all together.  

(I’m literally sitting here typing this and trying to remember a day like that.)

Let’s scratch that. I may have NEVER had it together.

What I do know is I am doing my best. I’m trying. I’m not giving up and I know you’re not either. Some days, it’s me trying to cook a healthy dinner and ending up with five-dollar pizza and breadsticks. Some days, it’s me trying to be a productive employee and focusing so much on getting my work day started that kindergarten registration slips my mind.

I know I’m not the only one who is handling all of this and more. To those other parents, I “Katniss salute” you. You are all my heroes.

My goal is to be there when my family needs me, to listen when they want to talk to me, and to make sure they know how much they are loved. I’m hoping that’s what they’ll remember instead of the raw chicken, burnt food, or terrible flavors…but why continue talking about my cooking?

Would I have preferred if my little one had showered the night before picture day at school and he was wearing a cute outfit? Yes. Yes, I would. But we can’t have everything.