I was sitting in the car on our way home from our recent trip to Disney World admiring photos of my daughter dressed as Chewbacca growling with her hands up in front of a very large Chewbacca character. I specifically looked for that dress for her, she’s a huge Chewbacca fan. I spent precious time researching different dresses and costumes that would be compatible with Florida heat. I picked and ordered the perfect matching bow and carefully chose shoes that wouldn’t cause blisters.
I paid the price of mental work only to miss out on the memory. I was busy either changing a diaper or working on making the next moments magical, but I wasn’t even there for the moment I imagined in my head months prior. This is just one of the many moments I’ve had similar to this in motherhood.
Being the “magic maker” takes so much work and effort, it’s one of the most important roles in the family.
This specific incident made me realize that even when we put in so much effort sometimes we don’t even get to experience the fruits of our very well-planned hard work. Not because we want to miss them, but simply because we are likely taking care of something else that needs to be done in order for the family to function.
The mental load of motherhood is often discussed amongst us as mothers. We all describe it as an ever-running list in our minds that occupies us even as we are trying to fall asleep at night. I’ve realized this running list of must-dos sometimes distracts me from the rewards of my hard work as the “magic maker.” Sometimes being the “magic maker” means we miss out on the magic moments we so carefully crafted.
I’m not hurt that I missed the moment, but it did make me realize that it’s important to allow yourself time to also witness these moments. In the fog of a busy Disney day, it was the only time she was able to meet her famed furry friend so I’m happy she was able to experience it and maybe that is enough. After all, I did get to fawn over the sweet photo of her happy smile.
Either way with the holidays coming up try not to find yourself so lost in doing so much that you forget to truly take in the magic that you spent precious hours preparing. It’s easy to do as the list builds this holiday season. We’re constantly drowning in our kids Christmas wish lists, Santa experiences, that elf that we tend to keep bringing to life every year, finding photographers and picking out the perfect family photo outfits, making the family holiday plans, helping your kids class with their holiday parties, dishing out Christmas lists to family members.
Allow yourself to stop for a moment amongst the chaos and watch the happiness swell in your children and not behind the screen of a recording camera, but really take in those gleaming faces and sweet dimples.
Our time as the “magic makers” is fleeting, but don’t spend so much time planning the magic that you forget to focus on the very reasons you work so hard in the first place.
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